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Whether through choice of school programs and extracurricular activities in college (I was a public relations major and I was in a sorority, both of which required a certain level of communications skills), or fields of work post-graduation (I work in nonprofits which tend to not only attract a wide variety of employees, but also a very diverse clientele), I’ve mostly always been around people who are pretty decent at holding a conversation. Trying to talk to men on dating apps is so horrifically painful.

I didn’t know it was possible for people to be so horrendous at conversation.

We’ve all got our go-to spots that keep luring us back, whether they are funky coffee shops, scenic hiking trails, or relaxing weekend getaway locales. ’ first date question, ask something more specific that will likely get an entertaining story about food and travel, rather than a one-word answer. In which television show’s world would you most want to live? Keep it light and fun and ask about the fictional world your date would most want to explore. This question offers plenty of freedom for him or her to share their dreams and interests with you.

They ask personal or sensitive questions that put the other person on the defensive.

Eminent psychologist Karl Menninger said one of the most reliable gauges of a person’s emotional health as an adult was a stable, satisfying childhood.

This doesn’t mean — of course — that you should automatically avoid someone who had a difficult upbringing. This question gets to the core of a person’s being.

After dedicating your time searching and fielding through profiles, you finally had an online witty conversation with a possible-match and you’re ready to take your could-be relationship offline.

It’s true that first dates can be one of the most nerve-wracking, anxiety-producing situations in our society.

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